TWO WEEKS EARLIER, ETHAN TOLD ME HIS PLAN
It was after two in the morning.
Neither of us had been sleeping much.
Our house in Bellmere had been painfully quiet for weeks.
Not peaceful.
Empty.
Every room seemed to remind us that one person was missing.
I found Ethan sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of tea he hadn’t touched.
Across his knees was a piece of red fabric.
My stomach tightened the moment I saw it.
“Ethan.”
He looked up.
His eyes were exhausted.
At eighteen, he had always looked so much like his twin sister that some mornings after waking, seeing his face could knock the air from my lungs.
“What are you doing with that?”
He looked down at the fabric.
Then unfolded it.
“I’m wearing it to graduation.”
I stared at him.
“What?”
“The dress.”
He smoothed the skirt.
“I’m wearing it.”
I recognized every inch.
Of course I did.
I had helped buy it.
Mary had chosen it herself.
“NO.”
Ethan looked at me.
“Mom.”
“No.”
I pulled out the chair across from him.
“Absolutely not.”
His expression barely moved.
“Why?”
“You know why.”
“I want you to say it.”
I lowered my voice.
“Because people are cruel.”
He said nothing.
“They’ll laugh at you.”
“I know.”
“They’ll take pictures.”
“I know.”
“They’ll post videos online.”
“I know.”
“Ethan, this could follow you everywhere.”
He met my eyes.
“I know.”
I leaned across the table.
“They’ll tear you apart.”
His face softened.
“I know, Mom.”
Then:
“It doesn’t matter.”
“It matters to me.”
He looked down at the red dress.
“I have to do this.”
WE HAD ALREADY LOST TOO MUCH
Only a few months earlier, our family had looked completely different.
Ethan and Mary had competed since childhood.
Who finished breakfast first.
Who got the better grade.
Who reached the car first.
Who got the bigger slice of cake.
If Ethan got ninety-six on a test—
Mary wanted ninety-seven.
If Mary ran faster—
Ethan wanted a rematch.
They teased each other constantly.
But beneath all of it—
they were inseparable.
Then Mary got sick.
And everything changed so quickly that I sometimes felt our old life had simply been erased.
Graduation preparation became medical appointments.
College plans became treatment schedules.
Normal teenage arguments happened beside hospital beds.
The red dress Mary had been so excited to wear to graduation stayed inside a garment bag.
And then—
we lost her.
Afterward, Ethan barely spoke.
Not about graduation.
Not about college.
Not about much of anything.
