I GAVE BIRTH ON A PLANE AT 35,000 FEET, AND A STRANGER HELPED DELIVER MY BABY — BUT AS WE PREPARED TO LAND, THE CAPTAIN ANNOUNCED, “THERE’S SOMETHING IMPORTANT THE MOTHER NEEDS TO KNOW BEFORE WE OPEN THE DOORS.”

“Cal,” he said carefully. “You need to see this.”

The video from row twelve was everywhere. Two million views overnight. Somebody had cut it into a forty-second clip and set it to dramatic music. The caption said: FAKE PARAMEDIC DELIVERS BABY ON PLANE — AIRLINE SAYS HE HAD NO LICENSE.

The comments were a war zone. Half the internet called Joaquin a hero. The other half called him a fraud, a creep, a liar who could have killed us both.

The woman in row twelve had been on three morning shows already. Her name was Lorraine Danvers. She was a medical malpractice attorney. On TV, she said she “wasn’t trying to hurt anyone” but that “rules exist for a reason,” and that she’d filed a formal complaint with the state.

SkyVista Air had issued a statement. We are reviewing the incident and our credential protocols. The individual in question misrepresented his qualifications to our crew.