Not because I wanted anyone’s approval.
Because I had spent four years being told something about myself that I was starting to believe, and I did not want to believe it anymore, and the way to stop believing it was to change the story.
The changing was slow.
It was the changing of someone who has spent years in a relationship with food as comfort and who has to learn a different relationship, which is not simple and is not linear and is not the before and after story that gets
turned into a magazine feature.
I found a nutritionist who did not make me feel like a problem.
I found a personal trainer who did not use shame as a motivator.
I learned to move in a way that felt good rather than punishing.
I learned to eat in a way that was sustainable rather than extreme.
I got contacts.
